


John’s Hope

by reigningqueenofwords



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Talk of infertility
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-27
Updated: 2018-12-27
Packaged: 2019-09-28 15:56:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17185994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reigningqueenofwords/pseuds/reigningqueenofwords





	John’s Hope

It killed you, knowing how much John wanted more kids, but feeling broken. You both did. You’d been trying for a couple years now, and it seemed a wedge was being shoved between you. Stress was wearing on you both.

Laying in bed, you stared at the ceiling. You finally caved and rolled over, looking at the clock. It read 2 am. Your eyes watered as you closed them, crying yourself to sleep.

* * *

The next morning, you came downstairs to see him all dressed for work, cooking breakfast. “Morning, sweetheart.” He said softly.

“I’m surprised you remember who I am.” You shot back. “You didn’t seem to remember where you lived last night.” Grabbing a coffee mug, you poured yourself some of the dark beverage. “I thought that we agreed to try last night?” Your eyes were on the mug in front of you on the counter.

John hung his head. “I couldn’t get my hopes up again, that this time we’d get lucky enough.”

Your eyes watered, your insides twisting. “I’m trying, okay?” Your voice cracked. “I’m doing everything the doctor’s been telling me.” The one thing that your body was supposed to be able to just do- and it failed you and your husband. “I’m sorry.” Picking up your coffee, you walked out.

His heart sunk, feeling like shit. He hadn’t meant to make you feel like this was your fault. Getting angry with himself, he through the spatula and sunk to the floor, his back against the oven.

* * *

You heard the spatula hit the wall and let out a choked sob, thinking he was angry with you. Part of you wanted to throw in the towel, and admit that you were faulty. Your body just wouldn’t do what it was supposed to, and it was ruining your marriage. The one thing you wanted to give him more than anything, and you couldn’t.

Watching the news, you sipped your coffee, not even really paying attention. “I’m sorry.” Came John’s low voice, making you look over as he sat next to you. “I never meant to make you feel like you were doing anything wrong. Or that this is your fault.”

“I don’t think I can do this anymore, John.” You told him sadly. Your voice was just above a whisper. “It’s tearing us apart, and I’m scared I’ll lose you because I’m broken.”

He cupped your cheek. “You are not broken!” He told you firmly. “And you will not lose me.” Hearing such passion in his voice fall in love all over again. “You want to stop trying? We’ll stop. I can’t stand seeing you like this. It’s killing me.”

Setting your coffee down, you held him close. “I love you, John.” You said gently.

“I love you. So much.” He replied, kissing your neck.


End file.
